Martha's Back and Even Better

I've been writing for this paper for four years, and yet I've never found a way to write about one topic nearer to my heart than anything else: Martha Stewart. When she was convicted and sentenced, first I cried (in a cab actually, when I heard it on the radio). Secondly, I hand-painted a "Free Martha" shirt which I promptly wore every day for the next week (I choose my causes well, clearly). And then, I tried to think of a way to somehow work it into the A&E section.

Suffice it to say, I wasn't that creative at the time. So, besides lobbying for her to be in the top 10 of Spectator's greatest Columbia alumni, I was basically left Martha-less in my writing. With only three weeks of papers left, I was starting to figure out how to incorporate her into my senior column, figuring it would be something about how I wanted her to be the CC Class Day speaker only to be met with incredulous "But she's a Barnard alum" statements by the rest of the committee.

And then, I came across the new show, Martha. I am usually never around when it's on, but thanks to my senior essay, I have been spending an ungodly amount of time in my room lately, and as there's nothing like watching Martha steam artichokes for a good study break, I quickly started to overdose. What I was presented with was a strikingly different Martha. This is not the Martha of the old Everyday Living show I used to record every day of high school. (I know, I know: bizarre. I once requested Silpat for Christmas-obviously I wasn't exactly a normal girl. And if you know what Silpat is, well, you're my hero.) This was an amazing reinvention of character. Kind of like Tom Cruise gone batty or Mel Gibson gone crazy religious, but in a good way. This was Martha made human.

The live format of her show has made it so that you see her mistakes, her reactions, and her sense of humor. So yes, she may be able to make a chocolate Easter bunny (yeah, you heard me, this week she made life-size chocolate bunnies. Can your hero do that? Yeah, I didn't think so), but she was laughing and conversational at the same time.

Joan Rivers was on the same show (so much strong Barnard-womanness concentrated on one small screen-if they had brought in Cynthia Nixon I think the set might have imploded), and it was during her banter with Martha that the new Ms. Stewart really came out. She was commiserating with Joan about being older, joking about Joan's match.com page, and making mistakes. OK, she only forgot to save 1/4 cup of crushed matzo while making matzo latkes, a mistake that was really Joan's fault. But the last time I saw Martha make a mistake, at the height of her pre-criminal popularity, it was not such a light-hearted affair.

She had Julia Child over for her holiday special, and they were doing something involving stacking balls of dough in a pyramid and flinging caramelized sugar on it. Martha's, of course, improbably turned out perfectly. Julia, however, was busy downing a little too much holiday wine to be doing anything such as stacking dough balls or spinning sugar. The thinly veiled hostility in the scene was what made the whole set-up work, and it was also what made the old Martha Martha. She was too perfect, cold, and ruthless. I loved her then, but it admittedly made her a target for comedians, disgruntled staff members, prosecutors-take your pick. If that scene were to take place on the new show, I can guarantee Martha would be downing wine and flinging spun sugar all over Julia.

Martha has accomplished the impossible in entertainment terms: she has kept enough of the old to still be "Martha," like the amazing crafts, the abnormal knowledge about things like French long-stem tulips, the ability to make you feel like you really must learn how to make that lemon tart now. But at the same time, she's made the fundamental personality changes-becoming less intimidating and uptight-that she needed to make after her time in prison (still hurts to write that). Coming out of jail may work well for rap stars, but for home improvement divas who have a reputation for being bitchy, it could have gone very wrong. In reinventing herself, Martha has ensured that we will be able to learn about "good things" for a long time. And suddenly, I'm in love again. You better believe I'll be TiVoing her talk show from here on out.

Ciel Hunter is a Columbia College senior majoring in English and comparative literature.