It's Not Our Fault We're Anti-Social

Sophomore slump is nothing new to college students. At Columbia, though, it might be augmented by University attributes that make it difficult for students to connect after their first year on campus.

During their first year, students constantly meet new people in classes, on their floors, and over meals in John Jay. Everyone complains about John Jay, but it is thanks to daily meals there that we are introduced to so many new people.

Most Columbia students do not enter John Jay after their first year. This is a tragedy because although everyone has to eat, most of us are too busy to meet up with friends during the week. The dining hall should be a place for students to come together, a forum for discussion, and a constant source of new friendships. The fact that this is not the case, compounded by Columbia's residential program's focus on small suites and single rooms, reduces the opportunities that Columbia students have to be social.

Harvard, Yale, and Princeton have "houses" or residential colleges. Even MIT is known for its active fraternity and sorority life. Many Columbia students chose Columbia precisely to avoid living arrangements that are defined by legacies and traditions and exclusivity. But we certainly miss out on certain aspects of student life because we do not have structured systems in which to run into people we know and because we do not live with the same small groups of students for four years. At universities like Harvard, Yale, and Princeton, students are encouraged by their living and dining arrangements to eat and socialize with their classmates on a regular basis, not just on the weekends. No wonder their alumni give more than ours do.

I love cooking for myself and having a nice kitchen in my suite, a factor that might keep me away from more social dining areas. Yet as much as I am against exclusivity and would prefer to make friends naturally rather than joining a group for that purpose, I would gladly give up my comfort for an environment more conducive to the continuous making of friends. The lack of structured opportunities for students to come together is, in my view, very detrimental to the Columbia community.

Sensing the changes at the beginning of my sophomore year, I added three clubs to my already overbooked schedule this semester, hoping I could make some new friends. I even joined the Living Learning Center-but I found no sense of this alleged community present when I moved in. Even in a suite, it is hard to find the time to sit down with my suite-mates for meals. It is unusual to meet people in classes, where we are expected to be quiet or else take part in heated debates, and so I find myself getting lonely from time to time. I know that I am not alone in this feeling. Most of my classmates have strong groups of friends from their first year, but they still find it difficult to keep in touch with friends or to solidify acquaintances from last year into friendships for this year without a dining hall or place to constantly bump into familiar faces.

Even my friends who renewed their meal plans face the same problem. As sophomores they use their points, carry out food, or have to plan days in advance to pin down a group of people to eat a meal with. Carryout is very handy, but I fear that it also will have a negative effect on shy first-years by not forcing them to sit down with new people during every meal.

As a sophomore who finds it ridiculously hard to synchronize my schedule with those of my friends, I wish there were a feasible meal plan for all classes at Columbia. I wish that I could still walk into the dining hall and feel normal sitting down with a table of people I vaguely know, exiting a couple of hours later with new friends.

I can see that residential colleges, eating clubs, and a stronger fraternity and sorority presence would not be in line with Columbia's unique character as students pride themselves on their independent lifestyles. But I think that something should change to ensure that as homework gets more and more demanding over the years, upperclassmen still find it easy to connect with people and make new friends. As the system stands, many people struggle not to isolate themselves with piles of books over solitary meals.

Perhaps sophomore slump gets better, or maybe upperclassmen just get used to it. But I, at least, want to graduate with a diploma as well as a group of friends whom I will enjoy for the rest of my life.