Until 1974, homosexuality was listed as a category in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.
While psychologists have progressed past viewing certain sexual orientations as disordered, students grappling with sexual identity often encounter unique mental health issues.
“For a population between the ages of 14 and 24, the rate of depression and suicidal gestures and completed suicide is higher for people who are struggling with these issues. It’s not a way of pathologizing, it’s a way of saying it’s a very difficult thing to deal with in a culture that’s so heteronormative,” said Mary Forbes Singer, a psychologist at Furman Counseling Center at Barnard who specializes in LGBTQ issues.
Young adulthood is often a time for defining identity, and for the LGBTQ community, it can involve coming out for the first time. Some students find the experience to be less liberating, and more stressful, than they expected.
Peter Gallotta, CC ’09 and former president of the Columbia Queer Alliance, said that coming out to his parents contributed to his experience with depression.
“My parents didn’t kick me out, but they haven’t really demonstrated a certain kind of acceptance and awareness that I would have hoped they would have found in their hearts,” he explained.
For the past four years, Gallotta has been a visible campus activist for LGBTQ issues. But it hasn’t always been easy.
“It was bizarre. It was such a double-consciousness thing. It’s like, I’m out loud and proud on campus, and yet, I’m hiding from my parents,” he said. “It frustrated me, but it probably fueled the flames of my work on campus. ... Columbia has been my proud parent, but it was also lonely to not be able to share something so meaningful with the people you are related to.”
In his time here, Gallotta said he has watched several of his friends struggle with similar issues. “I’ve definitely seen a lot of my friends bearing different burdens” he said of their experiences coming out, being openly gay, and, sometimes, hiding their sexuality. “Living with fear, paranoia, insecurity, anxiety. Living with rejection, hate, dejection. Feeling lonely, lost, uncertain. All of these emotions really build and break you.”
In response to student demand, both Columbia and Barnard employ several staff members at their respective counseling centers who specialize in LGBTQ issues—including Singer at Furman and Laura Pinsky at Counseling and Psychological Services, who is also the director of the Gay Health Advocacy Project.
“Students have voiced a concern that they’ve been overlooked. I think there’s a real effort being made to see how we can do a better job,” Singer said.
Some students said that staff can sometimes push gay students to see the LGBTQ counselor, even when sexual identity may not be their primary area of concern.
Hillary Ford, BC ’11, said that “Furman really pushes the gay angle, which for some people is annoying, but it’s ultimately a good strategy.” Gallotta agreed. “I think that helps,” he said of having LGBTQ specialists. “I like that the University is aware and acknowledges that it’s a growing issue.”
Melinda Aquino, Columbia’s interim associate dean of Student Affairs and senior assistant dean of Multicultural Affairs, said that part of the Office of Multicultural Affairs’ focus is to provide outlets for students who are confronting different questions of identity.
“Some students are comfortable being out and want to share their experiences, and are looking for a queer community and mobilizing,” she said. “Some people are in a place where they may have questions or barriers that make it more difficult for them. We try to meet people at different stages of their development.”
Many students find solace in the queer community on campus.
The first LGBTQ student organization of its kind, the Student Homophile League, was founded at Columbia in 1968, and the University is now home to numerous groups, including Q, Columbia Queer Alliance, Gender Revolution, Everyone Allied Against Homophobia, and Proud Colors.
Ford finds she can talk to her LGBTQ friends about depression. “The supportive community vibe goes a long way and I like that. I can talk to the same people about my bisexuality issues that I can with my depression issues,” she said. “It’s also added grounds for relating to people who have the same issues that I do and there’s kind of a lot of people who are like that.”
“I know that my community struggles very seriously with these feelings,” Gallotta added. “Recognizing one’s self [as a minority] comes with a loss in a social power. That loss in social power can send you to dark places, places of self-loathing ... loneliness, marginalization, and feeling like you perpetually don’t fit in.”
Though statistics show that LGBTQ individuals have higher percentages of suicidal ideation, anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues, gay students face many of the same issues as the general student population, “overlaid by a different prism,” Singer said.
“I was already depressed, and I already had anxiety,” Emily Kamm, BC ’11, said. “Coming out and feeling like I was different in this one more way was just something on top of it.”