Women should take female Viagra as it comes

I recently opened the paper to discover that this summer was the hottest New York had ever seen. We all felt it and reacted in different ways, but what intrigued me the most as I sat on the scalding curb in Brooklyn eating a $3 taco, or escaped to a bar with the atmosphere of an icebox, was how much people talked about sex. It was inserted into nearly every conversation—analyzed, laughed at, and frowned at. People couldn’t get enough of the dirty talk, especially me. There’s lots to discuss in this column over the next few months, but I’d like to start with something that’s gotten even the New York Times’ panties in a bunch: female Viagra.

I can’t count the number of times I’ve heard someone say, “Well, obviously, women don’t have nearly as many orgasms as men.” This statement is pretty depressing to me. We’ve supposedly gone through a sexual revolution and have become more open about sex. “Sex and the City” and Playmates are fixtures of American pop culture. So why do I hear the same exact statement over and over? Why do 70 percent of women in the United States not orgasm during sex?

Drug companies think they’ve found the beginning of a solution—albeit not an answer—to my question in the form of Flibanserin, a drug that studies show may raise a woman’s “sexually satisfying events” in the span of a month from 2.8 to 4.5. Sounds good, right? Not so much, since placebos increased the number to 3.7, making me wonder whether the patients simply needed to believe that they could feel good.

Though the Food and Drug Administration rejected the drug because of side effects such as dizziness and nausea, it did encourage the pharmaceutical company, Boehringer Ingelheim, to continue its research. I’m sure there are plenty of women who are excited by this news. Now that a pill can alleviate anything from a headache to depression, we often want a quick fix. Since Viagra first came out, drug companies have tested various alternatives for women. It took them a while to figure out that increasing blood flow to a woman’s genitals, the way Viagra does for men, was too simple a solution. As many researchers are finding out, a woman’s desire is multifaceted—it cannot necessarily be manufactured with a pill.

Lori Brotto, lead psychologist on a study of hypoactive sexual desire disorder for the upcoming edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, discovered through her research that most women respond physically when watching porn videos. She believes the problem lies in the mind-body connection, which is why the female version of Viagra has to be completely different from the blue pill.

Pfizer’s Viagra helps men with the physical aspect of being turned on—it creates an erection when a man is already mentally engaged. What companies are trying to create for women targets the brain and hormones, rather than a specific area of the body.

Consider the fact that Flibanserin was originally intended to be an antidepressant, with sexual stimulation being one of its side effects. If the only hurdle were a physical response, lubrication would have solved the problem long ago. Unfortunately, a woman’s lack of sexual desire can be rooted in anything from depression to stress to a negligent partner.

What scares me about all the ideas for a female Viagra is that they seem like shortcuts. Neither the companies nor the patients are questioning whether women who lack sexual desire might be better off with therapy or a re-evaluation of their partners, rather than a pill. Our society is quick to self-diagnose and self-medicate, rather than engage in a long-term process of introspection and self-assessment.

A friend of mine was in a long-term relationship with a guy she thought was her future husband. After about a year of dating, she suddenly stopped wanting to have sex. She blamed it on stress, herself, and anything else she could think of. It wasn’t until a few months after they broke up that she realized the problem wasn’t her—it was him. She wanted sex, just with other people. Her body had reacted early on to the problems in her relationship. This story makes me wonder how many other women blame themselves rather than external problems for their lack of sexual desire.

Clearly, women want this drug—the projected revenue for a female Viagra is $4 billion. And it’s not at all surprising that drug companies are all over a so-called pink pill—they go where the money’s at. But it’s up to us as a society to understand that a woman’s libido isn’t a paint-by-numbers picture. You can’t just throw some medicine at the right places and hope things work out.