No means no

Last Wednesday night, while Yale students were in their club meetings, studying in the library, or sound asleep in their beds, the brothers of Delta Kappa Epsilon were initiating their pledges. Blindfolded, the pledges, guided by the DKE brothers, marched past the freshman dorms on Old Campus, heading toward the Yale Women’s Center while chanting: “No means yes, yes means anal. Fucking sluts. My name is Jack. I’m a necrophiliac. I fuck dead women and fill them with my semen.”

Students at Yale were outraged, to say the least. And they’ve got a right to be.

Within hours, accounts of the initiation ceremony were uploaded to YouTube. Not surprisingly, the Yale Women’s Center had an especially strong reaction to this incident. In an email sent out to various campus organizations, the Women’s Center condemned the actions of the DKE fraternity, calling the chants a form of “hate speech.” They pointed out that these chants were, in fact, “an active call for sexual violence” by promoting and, in a way, glorifying rape.

While Columbia may not have a history of such obscene behavior among fraternities, it is no exception to the culture that demeans and objectifies women. Just a few years ago at the Take Back the Night rally, some fraternity members reportedly made catcalls toward the marchers as they passed the brownstones of Frat Row. As cringe-worthy as the DKE incident is, it’s nothing new for Yale women. During pledging season of the 2008 fall semester, the Zeta Psi chapter at Yale photographed their pledges posing in front of the Yale Women’s Center. They held a sign that read “WE LOVE YALE SLUTS.” In 2006, a group of frat brothers stole some of the Women’s Center’s T-shirts and had their pledges wear them as part of their induction into the fraternity.

Yale isn’t the only institution with a questionable fraternity culture. At Occidental College in California, the Alpha Tau Omega fraternity was suspended by its national chapter for circulating a poem describing “the violent rape of a woman” to its brothers in its monthly newsletter. At Dartmouth, the brothers of Chi Gamma Epsilon designed T-shirts for the school’s homecoming game with a female individual and a caption that read, “Come as you are, because running won’t fix your face.”

As undergraduates, we are no strangers to fraternity culture. I was warned of the dangers of going alone to frats by my first-year RA, and cautioned by my upperclassmen friends against visiting certain frats on campus with “sketchy” reputations. Fraternities have a culturally understood reputation for being the breeding grounds for collegiate sexual assault cases.

Yet, I also know young men in frats who have spoken out against the degradation and objectification of women. Many women in Columbia sororities are very good friends with a number of frat brothers, and have never had any offending experiences. Fraternities add to our campus and neighborhood, whether through their community service or philanthropy. They can provide young men with a valuable sense of community that extends far beyond their four years as an undergraduate.

But it is incidents like the DKE initiation that bring forth the misogynistic undertones that still linger within frat culture. In light of recent events, we should re-evaluate our own frat culture. Why are first-year girls warned of the dangers of Frat Row? Why do so many sexual assault and rape cases occur inside frat houses? The reputation that fraternities have not only harms women, but also hurts men. I don’t believe that all frat brothers are misogynists, but controversies like the recent Yale incident only further fraternities’ negative image.

The DKE brothers at Yale have attempted to correct their mistakes by apologizing to the campus community, admitting that their actions “were disrespectful, vulgar, and inappropriate.” They acknowledged that they were “insensitive of all women who have been victims of rape or sexual violence.” On Friday, they participated in the Women’s Center’s “Forum on Yale’s Sexual Climate.” As of Sunday night, the Delta Kappa Epsilon International Fraternity Board of Directors had suspended “all pledge activities until further notice.” Additionally, both the Sigma Alpha Epsilon and Sigma Phi Epsilon fraternities at Yale condemned DKE’s actions.

While DKE’s apology was necessary and its participation in the forum appreciated, it doesn’t compensate for the fundamental transgression. Joking about rape—especially in front of the Women’s Center, a safe haven for survivors of rape—is just not acceptable. Words are powerful and unchangeable once spoken. But no means only one thing: NO.

Vaidehi Joshi is a Barnard College senior majoring in English. She is the president of CU Chai Chat and a research assistant at the Barnard Center for Research on Women. Two Steps Forward, One Step Back runs alternate Wednesdays.