Columbia social life

As I anxiously surf the web, putting off my impending eight-page History of the Modern Middle East midterm, I came upon the headline “Columbia Ranked Second in Daily Beast’s Top 50 Most Stressful Schools.” The midterm, and my own procrastination, aren’t the only source of my Columbia-induced stress, though. It’s the lack of anything to do on campus past 9 p.m. Cue the elephant in the room and the other source of my disconsolation: “The Decision,” Dean Kevin Schollenberger’s choice to revoke Alpha Epsilon Pi, Pike, and Psi Upsilon’s housing for at least the next two years. This decision is final and cannot be appealed. So no, I am not writing this as a first-year member of Alpha Epsilon Pi trying to regain the rights to my 150 square foot, second floor, campus-facing, sophomore single. I am writing this as a Columbia student concerned about the future of our social life.

Whether the administration was capitulating to a board of trustees and media pressure or was more concerned with appearances than the moral appropriateness of their actions, I will leave up to you to decide. We can also question why the frats seemed to be the single group affiliated with the drug dealers that was reprimanded. Also, is it right to punish the first-year members of the fraternity, even when they are in no way culpable for the actions of juniors and seniors in their fraternity, and having pledged last semester, will not receive the benefits of being in that fraternity? These questions are of another debate though, and at this point, a fruitless one.

Instead, let's go over the definite—the repercussions of having a “fratless” frat-row. Due to suspension for violations as small as noise complaints, all three of these fraternities, along with others like Delta Sigma, haven’t been able to throw parties all semester.

Let’s face it: Since the drug bust, Columbia’s on-campus social life has been a sad reminder of past semesters that were downright embarrassing compared to your typical state school friends’ experiences.

Now, I’m not proposing Columbia become Penn State, nor am I complaining about the lack of cultural outings or nightlife opportunities in New York City. But in terms of partying as a campus—on campus with the entire Columbia campus community—the 2011 spring semester hasn’t allowed us any opportunity. So what are the repercussions of a quiet, neighborhood-friendly 114th street?
You might not believe in frats, and you may accept the stigmas that are associated with their members­—that they are all “bro-d out,” beer-shotgunning prepsters. And admittedly, these stereotypes are somewhat grounded in reality. But at least consider these premises—that NSOP week was one of the most fun, wild, and joyfully reckless weeks of your life, and that the frats, especially the “frat row” fraternities, facilitated that. Even as supposedly well-mannered, constantly composed Ivy League kids, frats are our guilty pleasures—outlets for our animal selves. They make the difference between being second or 20th on any “Most Stressful Schools List.”

As a result—assuming the decision’s irreversibility—if Columbia wants to save itself from being cast as a University of Chicago style, “Where fun goes to die” university, the administration must provide us with a viable alternative, a viable context in which, yes, we can party! Let’s not kid ourselves here—fraternities are not primarily philanthropic organizations, nor are they at any school, but they serve a demonstrable purpose for students whose GPA, homework, and career are constantly on their minds and who need a place to let loose. In fact, if students aren’t provided this alternative—this practical escape from the pressures of school—I predict they will resort to chemical escapes, namely, recreational drug use, the most immediate impetus for the administration’s new strictness.

Post-drug bust, post-media frenzy, the administration felt as if it needed to take action to repair its tainted image. If the student body demonstrates how much they want their fun campus back, in a way just as visible, Bollinger and Co. may just capitulate again. After all, we Columbia students don’t have a bad track record when it comes to causing a ruckus.

The author is a Columbia College first-year in Alpha Epsilon Pi.