What Do Risk and Columbia Football Have in Common?

THAT’S IT? I MEAN, WE BEAT VILLANOVA.
1. Yale 10-0 (7-0 Ivy)
2. Harvard 8-2 (6-1 Ivy)
3. Penn 7-3 (5-2 Ivy)
Except for Penn, my preseason predictions for the flag-bearers of Ivy League football are being realized. Then again, I wasn’t going out on a limb by naming Yale the undefeated and undisputed Ivy title holder. With four games left, who is going to beat them? Columbia? Brown? Princeton? Only Harvard—on the road at the Yale Bowl, mind you—stands a chance of ruining a perfect season for the Elis. It’ll be a helluva game, anyway, no doubt. Harvard will be facing the best team to come out of the Ivies in a long, long time.
Until last weekend, Yale’s season had been devoid of any sort of substantial obstacle on the way to their Mongol-hordes-sweeping-across-the-continent victories, which is why Yale has not and probably will not break into the top 10 of Division I-AA football. Saturday’s game went into triple overtime against the Quakers—finally a real test of the Elis’ tenacity.
But it was a freak game, something that should not have happened to any Yale squad of the past few years. With two key defensive players out due to injuries and junior running back Mike McLeod playing hurt (though you wouldn’t have known it—he tallied 147 yards on the ground. Then again, it was a season-worst for him), Yale ran onto Franklin Field with nicks in its rushing and defense. What’s more, quarterback Matt Polhemus put on his worst performance this year, throwing his three interceptions of 2007 all in one game into Quaker hands. With that the sort of handicap, Yale had to settle for winning by only six.
Including the near-travesty in Philadelphia, Penn has outscored its opponents 216 to 80. The average score of an Ivy matchup with Penn this season is 42-14. Mike McLeod is a name you’ve heard one too many times if you frequent this section, which thankfully isn’t many of you. He is, after all, the backbone of the Yale offense, as well as the kneecaps, the pelvic girdle, and humerus. Yale’s offense has 24 rushing touchdowns this season, 18 of which came from the hands of McLeod. Oh, and a total of two passing touchdowns. Maybe he’s a one-trick pony, but when the pony dives from six stories, does a double-barrel reverse into a tuck before skirting a ring of fire, hits the water cleanly and swims to shore (called a “Johnny Cash Carousel”), you have to say it’s a damn good trick.
The fact that there is any debate that this is the best Ivy team in a quarter century is yet another reason why there is something profoundly wrong with the Ivy League.
Yale has no chance to take on any school in the Bowl Championship Series, and for that matter none of the top teams in Division I-AA. There is no international exhibition at Wembley Stadium. There is no postseason, no playoffs. When the season draws to a close in four weeks, and Yale has proven itself the unquestioned alpha dog of Ivy football, the de facto alpha dog of the Patriot League, with a flawless record under their jockstraps, what will the Bulldogs get? The 2007 Ivy League title. Woo-hoo. Tell me, who won the Ivy League championship in 2000? Don’t worry, I’ll wait.
This team deserves the chance to leave a mark worthy of its accomplishments. But when a great team is left with “We beat Villanova football” as the top bullet point on its resume at the end of the season, there’s a certain injustice about it. Yale may be even better next year. They’ll return plenty of key starters who are juniors now, and there’s no reason to think they won’t be bringing in the choice Ivy League football recruits. But how can they do better than an undefeated season against largely mediocre teams, and the Ivy title?
I apologize for harping on a topic that’s gotten more than its share of coverage. My fellow columnist Kartik Kesavabhotla just wrote a few weeks ago about how the Ivies should elect to include themselves in the Football Bowl Subdivision playoffs (See “Ivy League Missing Out on Gridiron Glory,” Oct. 8). Moreover, this isn’t a policy that is going to change anytime soon. It’s unpopular among the few who care a lick for Ivy League football, but frankly there are politics and self-image concerns among the higher-ups stacked high against the prospect of reform.
My point is not to declare my allegiance to a pointless crusade. All I want to say, to those of you with the rare determination to make it this far into “Bad Newz, Mike,” is that we have to try to appreciate a team like this while it’s around. Columbia doesn’t have any legitimate rivalries anyway, so you might as well check out the Elis without feeling guilty.
I might actually make it to the game this Saturday. Mike McLeod is coming!
DEFEND IRKUTSK AND FAIRFIELD FROM THE MONGOL HORDES
There must be a few of you who don’t read Bwog ... there’s an Ivy League-wide online Risk tournament underway. Currently we are in planning stages only, placing troops and discussing strategy. Actually, there was a meeting last night in Broadway dorm conducted by our benevolent commander, Joseph Villarin, CC ’10. I am but a lowly peon in this great battle for Ivy League supremacy; however, I feel it is my duty as a journalist to abuse this column space for our mutual security. We face a grave threat to our way of life, and I am talking on the scale of George III and the British Empire. Seriously.
Brown prepares a gung-ho attack on our eastern front. Cornell lies in wait to our west with enough soldiers to take Fordham. As of this writing, we have a pact with Dartmouth, but they won’t be in this game long. Along their southern border, to our north, a storm gathers with the strength to wipe out the entire eastern seaboard in just a few turns. Not since Xerxes has our valiant group of 300 players met such an adversary. The Bulldogs are now over one thousand in number and may claim the Ivy League Risk Championship before November, which would suck. This title, unlike football, actually means something.
There is still time to come to the aid of your fellow Columbians. Our borders are looking very vulnerable right now. So please, after you are done reading all the fine news reporting the Columbia Daily Spectator (independent since 1962) has to offer, go on Bwog and read “Militarism Grips Ivy League.” Together we will crush the Eli invaders. How I hate them so.