Joe Saia

After the drink-happy hours of reading week have waned and the oppressive superstructure of finals week have begun to weigh on the collective Columbian conscience, casual and hard-core video gamers alike might be tempted to throw up their arms in desperation.

Fifteen minutes into Dark Sector, scruffy Tom Cruise look-alike hero Hayden contracts a virulent infection, decides to find the source of his disease, and gorily sprouts a bladed Frisbee of Death out of his right hand.

Amid surprise generated by recent reports that the video game industry pulled in a record-breaking $18 billion in the U.S. in 2007, many analysts were taken aback by the additional news that two of the year’s most popular games were also two of the year’s most musically eclectic.

I am a happy man. Why? Because of the sultry hookup I had with an absolutely gorgeous woman this past weekend.