Discovering the Unexpected in Sisterhood

Illustration by Grace Duffy

“This is an individual choice. You really need to figure out which house is right for you, because who knows if in the end you and your friend will be accepted into the same house. It’s really personal...” says the woman standing before a large, all-female group of Columbia first-years as she dictates the importance of open-mindedness when approaching Columbia Greek life. The girls around me are engaged. I watch as they twirl their perfectly brushed locks around their nervous fingers and fix their carefully chosen outfits for the night. I, however, am texting. I am telling my friend at another school that I have spontaneously made the decision to join the other 99 or so freshman and “rush.” Like my family and other close friends, she is surprised.

Neither I nor anyone else who knows me would ever describe me as the stereotypical sorority girl. Sure, I’ve seen and enjoyed Legally Blonde just as many times as the next girl, but I’d never expect myself to don a shirt emblazoned with Greek letters. So naturally, I wasn’t entirely enthusiastic about rushing at first, though admittedly, I wasn’t taken by force, either.

As rush week continued, I began to learn more about what each house represented and had to offer. Each sorority was filled with girls who seemed exactly in their place, but at the same time, every girl had interests of her own—her own story to tell, and her own reasoning for being in her particular house. However, there was a commonality among the sisters in each house. I didn’t meet a single girl who would describe themselves as “the sorority type.” Is this because they don’t exist at Columbia? Or is everyone self-conscious about their sisterhood? Is being the “sorority type” a bad thing?

Sororities are defined as a group of women sharing a common goal of pride in themselves as a unit, their house philanthropy, and the qualities of sisterhood that they try to protect. While the sanctity of Greek life does not reign as strictly at Columbia as in other schools, the meaning behind the houses is still explained thoroughly and cleverly by the sisters during rush week. They use skits and song parodies to walk you through the ways of the house, and while sitting through all of them may have been a little bit tiring, each sorority had a great showing of spirit and energy that showed they were more than happy to be representing their house.

Although I’ve never before considered myself the type to band together with a group of singing girls, usually confiding in a smaller group composed of both sexes, I feel confident and stable in my decision to pledge. There is not one particular “type” of girl in each sorority. Throughout the week I met rowers, painters, fencers, fashionistas, and mathematicians. Many women shared their stories of having mixed sentiments at the outset of rush week, but eventually finding their place and remaining entirely satisfied and unshaken with their decision to join a sorority. I surprised myself by sticking it out through the week.

I have met many girls who seem to define themselves by not conforming to Greek life. However, having once had my own preconceived negative notions about sororities, I can say that there is no harm in trying. I now feel personally more non-conformist than ever for going after something new, making friends with different people, and obtaining a goal I never realized I wanted.

I wasn’t brainwashed by the sorority sisters and was happily surprised that I decided to continue and pledge. The point is that I don’t think any one is as “sorority-like” as I expected. Amid the wildly distracting backdrop of Manhattan, I am looking forward to having a network of sisters that are happy to have me as well. I recommend trying to hurdle the largely exaggerated stereotypes against rushing. Mocktails aside, rush isn’t as overwhelming or intimidating as it seems. After having gone through recruitment week and actually familiarizing myself with the process, I am now far more willing to accept the title of sorority girl.

The author is a Barnard College first-year.