Olivia Ferrucci

Picture this: It’s NSOP, and you’re experiencing the indescribable feeling of total independence. I’m zigzagging my way through Carman when his name—we’ll call him Josh—comes up on my screen in the form of a Snapchat notification. Josh and I haven’t really talked in person before, but we have the God-given bond of living on the same floor; we are profoundly connected. Right? Right. Thus, before I know it, I’ve invited him back to my dorm and we are having a mediocre hookup. Both of us know the hookup is mediocre while it is happening. So once we get our clothes back on, we awkwardly hold conversation for a few minutes and then I send him on his way.