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Life happens:
8 smart people
who broke their
phones in dumb ways
Man holding puzzle piece
Columbia has spoken: Here are the ways our students have broken their phones in dumb ways. Be prepared to say “yikes”; these stories will make you want to buy a protective phone case and get some insurance for your phone before anything happens to your beloved device.
Cat on windowsill in front of snowy scene
1
a break-in
gone bad
This happened around 2015 or so. I was going to my grandma’s apartment in Washington Heights. When I got there, I noticed there was nobody home. I had no way to get in, but I knew my grandma often left the fire escape window open. So, I explained the situation to my grandma’s neighbor, our close family friend, and asked her to let me break in through the fire escape. Of course, she said yes and as I’m making my jolly way over to my grandma’s window, my phone SLIPS out of my pocket, falls down FIVE STORIES and crashes onto Broadway. Mortified, I ran down to find my phone completely shattered. Thankfully though, nobody got hurt.
2
a series of
unfortunate
events
It’s midnight at JJ’s and I sit down with my fries and chocolate chip pancakes. I hear my iPhone X OLED screen smack the floor facedown. Seeing as this was the 300th time my indestructible baby had fallen without a scratch, I picked it up thinking everything was completely fine. There was a bright white stripe along the side, covering 33 percent of the view. The screen had been damaged and it was time for a replacement, but I'm not your Average Joe. Instead of contacting the Apple Store, I googled DIY iPhone screen replacements and purchased my own part on the ever-so-resourceful Internet. The new screen arrived, and I took off the old screen SUCCESSFULLY! The new, cheaper LCD screen was 100 percent operational. However, it was at the cost of Face ID. The screen was working perfectly until the morning of my discrete math midterm exam. Rushing to the exam, I dodged as a cab almost hit me, causing my phone to fly corner-first onto the pavement. Immediate webs took over the bottom of the phone. I was only able to experience one week of glory.
Person sitting in front of stopped car in nature
Large boat with setting sun in background
3
when being
good goes bad
I was trying to give a lovely tour guide donation funds for the free ferry service we had received. Instead of pulling money out of my pocket, my phone fell onto the metal stairs of a boat. Needless to say, both my phone and my heart shattered.
Woman in bikini on donut-shaped raft
4
truth or
dare
Last summer, I was swimming with friends. One of my friends dared me to toss my phone up in the air and catch it. Being naïve at the time, I took him up on the dare. Foolishly, I tossed the phone as high up as I could, and rather than catching it, it landed on the hard poolside. Frantically, I hopped out of the pool to see if it was all right. As my friends were laughing and taunting me, I came to find that my phone was severely cracked. The sudden revelation caused me to burst into tears, which then caused me to lose focus again. I dropped my phone a second time, but not on the poolside: I stupidly dropped the phone into the pool. Now, in addition to the unsightly cracks, the phone had severe water damage. I officially had enough, so I ran back home to see if I could save the phone. I tried placing my phone in a bag of rice. At the time, I read online that placing an electronic in a bag of rice can eliminate the water damage. I left the phone in the rice for about three hours. When I came back to see if my phone was able to turn on, unfortunately, it didn't. My phone was officially dead. Moral of the story: Don't accept stupid dares from friends.
5
A wild ride
To celebrate my birthday, my partner and I went to Orlando for the weekend. Being huge Potterheads, we made our first stop at Universal Studios, where we stood in a queue for over two hours to get an opportunity to ride in Hagrid’s Motorbike, the scariest roller coaster. We finally sat on the bike, ready to zoom into the Forbidden Forest amid the thick lush greenery on a crazy topsy-turvy track. As we went upside-down, so did my phone, and while I was screaming my lungs out, my phone was screaming to be saved. Thud! The phone fell on the floor of the bike and due to the high speed and pressure, a crack appeared on the screen. A little later, the edge was chipped off. The ride ended and so did the life of my phone.
Person on scooter
Person lining up to start running in race
6
a runner's
aesthetic
mistake
I attend school in New York, but whenever I am back home in San Diego, I go for a run to take full advantage of the friendly weather. I bring my phone with me on runs so it can track my distance and steps. That being said, I continue refusing to put a case on my phone for “aesthetic” purposes. This arrogance caught up to me when I dropped my phone on asphalt just two days before I was flying back to New York.
7
a shot,
interrupted
Being the unsporty person I am, I was holding my phone while passing a basketball to my friend in the court. Of course, I threw the phone with the basketball and watched as my electronic flew in a 10 feet arc before landing with the ball. My phone was shattered and I never played basketball again.
Person jumping with basketbal, about to dunk
Woman with suitcase holding onto subway pole while looking at phone
8
thank you
for your
service, mta
Growing up in New York City, one crucial part of getting to school was taking the train. I first learned how to do this in sixth grade when I had to take the subway three stops to get to my school. I had one of those old flip phones. One day during the first week of classes, as I was walking on the train platform, my phone flew out of my pocket and landed on the train tracks. I was so scared. I didn't know what to do and felt like I had lost all hope. I was seriously considering jumping onto the train tracks to get my phone, but then I realized that I couldn’t do that. I had to go to the subway attendant to ask them to go in and get my phone for me. They told me they couldn't get it right away but if I came back later that day, they would have it for me. So I spent all day in school crying because I thought my parents were going to get super mad at me and that they were not going to let me have my phone anymore. However, on the way home after school that day, I went straight to the attendant and they had my phone for me. It was lit.

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